150: [STORYTIME] 9 Things I’ve Done in My 29 Years That I’m Proud Of!

Audio disclaimer: My mic was not the source of choice for today’s episode which means the audio is slightly lower quality than normal! So sorry for this hiccup - we will be back with solid audio next month! 

Happy birthday to ME! In today’s new episode, we are celebrating my birthday together by going over nine things that I have done in my 29 years that I am proud of. I hope that by sharing this with you, you start to take stock of things you’re proud of because you deserve that kind of recognition!

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Transcript

Maddy: 0:00

Happy birthday to me. I am almost 30 Hey bestie and welcome to the living in sunshine podcast. I'm your host, Maddy fry. And around here we are all about encouraging, inspiring, and giving you the tough love that you need to hear to get out there and live as your best self. Each and every Wednesday, you can expect to learn tangible tips to help you find your bigger purpose. be given simple action steps that you can take in order to make progress toward your biggest dreams. And hear how you can purposely pursue joy on the daily. So sit down, grab your favorite drink. And let's have a girl chat. This is the living in sunshine podcast. Good Morning, my friends. And welcome back to the living in sunshine podcast. As you can tell by my beautiful singing voice I mean I am the next Adele, let's just be real. It is my birthday. Every single year, I love to do a birthday episode. And you guys always seem to really like this as well. And so for this year also my birthday was on the 14th April 14. So if you didn't say happy birthday by send me a message right now I'll say Happy Birthday rude. We are doing nine things I've done in my 29 years that I'm really proud of taking a little nod giving a little nod to the first episode of April where we are talking about celebrating ourselves more often. If you haven't yet listened to that episode, go do so right now. Actually do it after you listen to this episode. Just listen to both of them. Give me a birthday present to be free. We love that. I turned 29 Which is crazy. I have one more year until 30. And I might be in the minority about this. If you are like on my same wavelength with this send me a message on Instagram. I love the idea of getting old. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not afraid of it. It doesn't freak me out. The fact that I'm almost 30 Like, doesn't make me worried that like I'm not doing enough. Like, I genuinely and I have said this for years. I can't wait to be like a 50 year old daddy with gray hair like living her best life. Truly. I cannot wait. I don't want to rush it by any means. But I'm also not afraid of it. Like I have had conversations like lengthy conversations with friends who are like genuinely scared of getting old. And I'm just like, Hmm, I don't really care. I think it's awesome. I think older people first and foremost, I hate that the word old is like a bad thing, right? Like I hate the negative connotation of old. Like, if you call someone old, they instantly get like super uptight and like grouchy about it. Like if you call my mom old, she gets very mad about that. I'm just like, I but I like that. Like I think that's cool. Like I love old people. Um, I have friends who are like genuinely scared and nervous about getting old. And I'm just like, I welcome it 30 flirty and thriving, right? I'm all for it. So in this episode, just to bring it back and reel it in just a little, we are going over nine things I have done in my 29 years of life that I'm really proud of because one celebration is amazing. As we all know, celebration breeds motivation. And too, I hope that by sharing what I am proud of that I've done in my life, I hope that it inspires you to make your own list, make it 10 things, make it 20 things, make it five things, right. But make sure that you are taking stock of things that you have done that you are proud of, because you deserve that kind of recognition. And when you recognize yourself in that way, you'll start to see that other people start to recognize it too, which is really friggin rad. All right, so thing, number one that I have on my list here of things that I have done that I'm proud of, is working to build the mindset of abundance instead of scarcity. And I was having a conversation with Mary, shout out to my therapist, Mary in case you're new here and you're like Who the heck is Mary? Mary is my therapist, and I love her. We were having a conversation in therapy last week. And we were talking about trauma because your girl has a lot of it. But we were talking about how a lot of people kind of go back and forth where if you have experienced trauma, your mindset as an adult is either one of positivity and abundance and, and joy and all of these things. Or the other way around, right scarcity, fear, anxiousness, worry all those things, right. And sometimes you can teeter in both I definitely teeter in both. But she and I were having that conversation about like, you know, we wonder why some people go one way and some people go the other, right. And this is something that I have really had to grow. This is a skill I have had to learn and practice. But I'm so glad that I did it at such a young age, right. I feel like sometimes you hear about people in their 20s just kind of like fluttering through life and not really know where they're going and like we all have that like, you know, early 20s crisis I definitely did. But in that I didn't sit in the I write and I'm really proud that I consumed the personal development, I read the books, I listened to the podcast, I surrounded my people, or myself with people who, who had the kind of mindset that I wanted to have. Because now as I get closer to 30, my era of 30, I am moving into that next sort of season, it feels like a season of life where I know what it means to live abundantly. And I love waking up every single day, joyful and obsessed with the life that I get to live, right like, because I have built this mindset. And I have learned this skill, and I have practiced it daily for years. I very often am living in abundance, I have enough, I have enough love, I have enough money, I have enough relationships, I have enough, right? There is no scarcity. And I'm really proud that I did that work to grow and flex that muscle. And I'm just it's the number one thing I'm proud of I live the way that I live, I have the energy and the mindset and the relationships that I do. Because I did that work. And without that work, I wouldn't be where I am, I wouldn't have the accomplishments that I do. I wouldn't have the laundry list of successes that I do if it weren't for doing that work. And I'm just I'm proud that I did it. I really am. Thing number two that I am proud of myself for doing was a huge goal for myself, when I moved to Charleston, up back at the beginning of 2023. And that was making new friends. I am so proud of myself for getting uncomfortable, to put myself out there to meet new people and meet new friends. And I think I've talked about this on the podcast before but for the longest time, I was feeding myself this line of like, I don't need friends. I don't like meeting new people. I'm a homebody did it that could not be further from the truth. Hello. I love meeting new people. I love seeing people and hugging people and hanging out with people and talking to people. When I was in high school all growing up, I would intentionally join clubs and do things where I knew absolutely no one. So I could meet new people. And so when we moved to Charleston, I told myself, I will make friends, I will actively pursue friendship and connection and put myself out there and go try new things. And I've done that. And listen, I'm not here for numbers. I'm here for quality, quality over quantity. I have two very good friends who I see every single week, sometimes multiple times a week. And I love them, like with my whole heart. And I'm so grateful they're part of my life. And I'm proud of myself for putting myself out there to meet them and connect with them, and get to know them right. And of course, I have more than just in real life friends, I have tons of friends. Some of you guys are my friends online. But my goal when we moved here was to make in real life friends. And I've done that. And I'm so grateful for that. And I can't wait to continue to grow this network this in person relationship with other people here in Charleston. So if you are a Charleston, girlie, and you want to be friends, hit me up over on Instagram, and let's meet up for coffee because I am in the market and always open to new friends. Thing number three is a big one, and will hopefully speak to a lot of my online business owners, but I'm really proud of building my businesses to where they are on my own. And when I say on my own, I really mean on my own. But like there are people who have helped me to get to where I am, and I will forever be thankful for them. But being a business owner is really hard. And it's always a learning curve. And there are so many situations and points where I had been like I am done. I have out kept me out, put me out, I need a break, I'm ready to be benched. Like just send me home so I can go to bed and just do something new tomorrow. But I stuck it out. And I've dealt with some really hard things. And I've navigated some really tough seasons. And I'm really freaking proud of where my businesses are. I mean, I have increased my revenue year over year, I've increased my income year over year, I have worked with some amazing, incredible human beings and have been invited in and asked to do really incredible things because of the businesses that I built. And that to me is just so rad. And like I can't again, I can't wait until I'm like 65 talking to someone and being like, I did this thing in my early 20s. Can you believe it? Because I can't. It's just so cool to me to be like, You did that like a little tiny genius. You're so cool. Like what's so thing number three that I'm really proud of that I've done in my 29 years. It's just building my business to where they are. Am I making a million dollars a year now? Am I making six figures a year? No. But to go back to think number one, what I have is enough. Right? Let me I just I'm going off on a riff here. I'm really sorry for all of my business owners. Please never forget that your level of success US does not need to be six and seven figures, please know that your level of success does not need to be sold out courses are sold out memberships, or a fully booked, coaching schedule. Those things are beautiful. But those things are, are rooted in Vanity, right? What's going to actually make you happy, happy. The thing that makes me happy about my businesses is they pay my bills, they allow me to contribute to my household income. And they allow me time to go hang out with my friends that I've made, right success, big wins big ups here for it. I'm not worried that I'm not making 100k I'm not worried that I don't have a seven figure business and I'm rolling in cash every single time I talk about my course or my interest or my whatever online. So what I'm here for, I'm here for the connection. I'm here for the sustainability. I'm here for the support, and I'm here for the community, right, have the things I'm good to go. It is okay, if that is your level of success as well, moving things that read along to that this podcast episode is not 45 million years long. Thing Number Four that I'm really proud of. And I've talked about this a couple of times over the last couple of months on the podcast, is the relationship that I have built with my husband. So for anyone who is new Lucas, aka the coupon boy has been my husband for almost four, five years. And my partner for 11 years, we have our 11 year anniversary in May. So like literally two weeks from the point this podcast comes out. And I'm just really proud of the relationship that he and I have formed. He is my partner, he is my best friend, he is my husband, my confidant, my number one fan. And I am the same for him. And it has not been easy. The last year of our relationship, there have been ups and there have been downs, there have been very, very high highs. And there have been very low lows, right? Like there hasn't always been beautiful sunshine, rainbows, butterflies, all the things. It's been work, right. Like you hear people who are like in their, you know, 40s or 50s being like, oh, marriage is a lot of work, marriage is brutal. They're not raw. Like he and I are in a really good space. And I'm obsessed with them. And I love Him with everything that I am. But it's also work. And I'm really proud because we have both continued to show up to do the work, and to put in the work for each other, and also for ourselves. And I am just really proud of that, because so many people, so many people, there is a reason our divorce rates in the US are as high as they are. Because so many people don't show up and put in the work. And he and I are thankfully in the same space, the same podium, the same mindset that we're not quitting, we will not lose this game, losing is not an option, quitting is not an option. And we are here to show up and do the work. And I'm proud that we both continue to do that. And I share this not for oh my god, are they okay? And we're going to know I share this because if you are someone who is in a long term relationship, or in a relationship that you want to work, and you want to make work, show up and do the work, it's okay to say this is really hard, or you hurt me in this way, or I'm uncomfortable or disappointed or my needs aren't being met in this way. Can we please work on this? It's okay to say that. And it's okay for your relationship to not be beautiful, wonderful, perfect butterflies, angels unicorn poop all the time. So possible. It's not it's not going to happen. But when you commit to doing the work, you will build something so beautiful. And something that you love so much that when you're around other people, they see it too. And and that's where we are. That's where Lucas and I are. And I love that and I'm so proud that we have both decided to do that work and do it internally and individually, but also as a team, because that's what we aren't we're team. And so I just hope that this gives anyone currently going through stuff within their relationship, friendship, familial, you know, what's the word when it's not opposite of platonic, romantic, right? Whatever it is, it's okay to want to continue to put in the work just because you see other people, you know, dip in and leave in and opting out, you don't have to opt out, you can opt in, you can say I'm here, and I'm gonna do the work and I'm gonna continue to show it because I love you. And I want this to work. Moving right along to thing number five, something that I'm really proud of that I do all the time, sometimes to a fault is always putting Joy first no matter what. And this is actually something that like I've had to really work through with Mary. Well, Mary's got a lot of shout outs in this episode. Go Mary. Mary, if you're listening, shout out girl. Because I know that you know the name of my podcast. I don't know if you listened to it, though. I don't know if that's like a weird patient confidentiality thing anyway, always putting Joy first. Okay. And this is something that matters to me a lot because of my childhood because of my internalized trauma and because I'm trying to heal my inner child. And this is something that I've had to work through with marry, because sometimes, the way that this manifests in my life is pivoting and changing course and doing something new. If you know me, if you have followed me online for any amount of time longer than like two years, you know that I have done a lot of things, online teaching, selling Etsy products, working in a school, doing network marketing, this podcast, living in sunshine, being a virtual assistant, all the things. The reason for that is because I do not want to do things that don't bring me joy, life, in my opinion, is not, and this is going to come through on when I don't meet you. But life, the purpose of life is to do things that make you happy, and to do things that bring you joy. And I'm not saying that life is always wonderful and joyful and happy and easy. But to the to the root of it all, if you take everything else away. If you can't, and someone asks you, Are you happy? Are you joyful? Are you doing what you love? If your answer is not, yes, then what is the point? Right. And so I do this a lot with what I do for a living and and the dreams that I pursue and the goals that I set for myself. And I love that I do this. And I'm proud that I do this because it has helped me to create a life that is so full of different learning experiences, and people that I've met and things that I've gotten to do. And I just think that is so cool. And I just love that. And I know some people are like it, if you want my life, we're like this, we're like, I'm totally happy to work a job that pays my bills, but I don't necessarily love and I'm, I'm fine to stay in a relationship that is like, you know, they're cool, but like, they don't really support me or, or you know, it's fine that I live in a city like because it's where my parents live, I don't really like it, but like my family's here, so I'm going to stay, I would not do any of that. I would not do any of that. I would be like I'm out. new job, new city, new relationship, peace out goodbye, calculator. And for some people, they see that as being flaky. And I have even struggled with that belief that I can't commit to things I'm not. I'm not. I'm flaky. I changed my mind too soon. Like, why can't I just find my thing. Some of us aren't meant to have one thing. I'm not meant to have one thing. I am the kind of person who my one thing is my one thing for about two or three years, and then I changed my thing. Why? Because it doesn't bring me joy anymore. Because I'm feeling stagnant. I'm feeling I'm feeling stuck. And I And that's not the life that I want to live for myself. So instead of staying in that mindset of I'm flaky, I'm unreliable, I changed my mind. I can't figure it out, did it? I'm lost, right? What's my purpose? This is my purpose. My purpose is to live life fully live life joyfully. And to be really proud of that. And I'm really proud that I always put Joy first in my relationships, and my work and my goals and where I'm going and what I want from the world and what I want from my life. And I am really freaking proud of that. All right thing number six, working to have solid eight F boundaries, when and where I need them. I talked about boundaries before here on the show, if you are just finding the show, feel free to go search for those boundaries are a huge tool to living a joyful life. And something that I could just stand on a soapbox for hours and hours and hours and hours and hours. And talk about I don't have time for that today. So I'm just going to say I am proud of myself for setting solid boundaries within my family, within my work within my relationships, that helped me to protect my mental peace and my mental well being. Because I know that there are people in my life professionally or personally, that need to have those boundaries that I need to put both hands up and say, Ooh, we are not doing this. I am not doing this. We're not participating in this narrative. We're not having this conversation. I am not coming to that thing. I am not saying yes to that project because it threatens my own personal peace. And I'm not doing that. And this again, setting boundaries and following through on them is a skill is something you have to practice. And it's something that you have to learn. But when you learn it, there's so much power to it. And I'm proud that I have learned this again at such a young age, to know that it's okay to set a boundary to set a boundary and say I'm not doing that. You are not doing that to me you are not talking to me that way. You are not telling me to do that you are not treating me this way. We are not doing this because that is you putting yourself first and you deserve to put yourself first all the time. Please your God be selfish in this way. Do and have more boundaries than you think you need. If you think you need them, you need them. If you need them, you should set them and then back them up. Stand your ground. Don't let anyone push you over To Be who you need to be in order to protect your peace at all costs, it is worth it. Number seven is one of those things that two or three years ago, me would be like, Ah, you're so cute. But now that I get it, I get it. Right. So thing number seven that I'm really proud of that I have done it my 29 years is breaking free of the hustle culture, in order to welcome in more space and more fun into my schedule. Right? Perfect example, yesterday, a friend of mine had a nail appointment at 245. And I have so much work I need to be doing, like so much work I need to be doing. And she's like, you want to get your nails done? And I said, Yes. And then she said, Do you want to work afterwards? And I said, Absolutely. And the reason this is an accomplishment is because three to three years ago, I would have been like, I'm really sorry, I can't do that I have to work. And I would have put my work in front of my life. And that's not cool. Not anymore. I don't think that that's cool. I think that our work should come after our life. I think that our life needs to be a priority. And our work supports our life. And I'm proud of breaking through and breaking out of that hustle culture that we see all the time online on TV and movies and even other things, right. I'm done. I'm opting out. My friend wants to go to dinner, but I still have a project to do. I'm coming to dinner, let's go get Mexican. My friend asked me to go do something Lucas wants to go out on a walk. Goodbye, I'm closing my laptop, let's go for a walk. My mom calls me Hey, I'm gonna go do this soon as we can you want to come, oh, I have all these things I need to know, I'm just gonna go do I'm gonna go enjoy my life, I will get it done. I will prioritize my schedule the right way to get it all done. Because it always gets done, right. But I'm not going to say no to my life all the time. Now for my work. I'm just not doing it. It doesn't bring me joy. It burns me out. It makes me feel overwhelmed. And like I'm missing out. I'm not doing it. And I'm really proud of breaking out of that hustle culture of go go go go go. If you're not doing your goals, if you're not chasing your dream, if you're not, if you're not doing that 100% of the time all the time. Like you don't want it enough or you're not working hard enough. I don't have time, I do not have time for that narrative, I do not have the mental capacity to even think that way anymore. I'm going to structure my schedule in my life in a way that supports me to have a life outside of my work. And I'm really proud that I have gotten to this point, because I 100% am a recovering workaholic. I love what I do. I love working. I grew up in a household where working was everyone around me was working hard. We were always working. We were always hustling, I grew up in that culture. But it's not sustainable. And I'm really glad that I have learned that. And I'm really glad that I have broken free from that mindset. So now I can live a life that fulfills me. And I have a work schedule that supports me. And I am and I have space to do all the things that I want to do. Now, the next thing on my list of nine things that I am proud that I have done in my 29 years is a big one, and something that you guys asked me about all the time. But the thing that I'm really proud of that I've done in the last 29 years is never being afraid to be a beginner. And to choose a dream and chase a dream that really matters to me. Like I've mentioned before, kind of half jokingly, I've done a lot of stuff. But all of the stuff that I have done, I have done because I wanted it and I have done as a newbie, someone who had no idea what she was doing, and someone who went after it anyway, because it mattered. And it was important. And it was something worth chasing. And it was something that I wanted. And I know that I wanted that for myself. And so I've continued to show up and pursue these things and just not be afraid to be new not be afraid to be a beginner. And something that I'm really proud of is because of this mindset. I've gotten to do a lot of really cool stuff. Like I've gotten to do so many cool things, that if I hadn't been in that mindset, I wouldn't have done that. I wouldn't have been able to say, I did that. Right? If people asked me they're like, Well, how do you do that? How are you not afraid? Or how are you just willing to go into it without knowing? And my answer is I just don't care what people think about me. I don't care if people see me flop or fall on my face or or trip or whatever it might be. I don't. It's not their life. It's mine. And if I'm having a good time I am I am finding joy in this thing. I will go after it full throttle and not worry about not having all the answers and that's something I'm really proud of and something that I really genuinely love about myself. And finally, the last thing that I am really proud of myself for doing is prioritizing my whole health My mental health, my physical health, my emotional health. I mentioned before I am 100%, in the season of like healing my inner child, and working to really support myself at all angles. I like to go to the gym, I like to lift I like to work out, I like to eat well, I like to work on my mental health, I go to therapy, if I'm feeling sad, I let myself feel those things. And I am really proud of myself for doing this. Because again, that wasn't something I used to do. That wasn't something that I used to practice, I used to shove and push things down, I used to work out because I felt like I had to or that I needed to not because I wanted to I I would keep things to myself. And I would close myself off if someone hurt me instead of talking about my feelings. And it just created this person who wasn't fully optimized. And I know that that might sound kind of bizarre, what does it mean fully optimize. When I say I want to be fully optimized, I mean, I want my health to feel good. I want my relationship to feel good. I want my mental and emotional health to feel good. And I'm proud of myself for investing time, money, energy, emotions, into those things, in order to be fully optimize, to fully take care of my whole self instead of just different parts of myself, because you can't live a fully joyful life, if all parts of you aren't optimized. And I'm glad that I've learned that now. Because now I have the rest of my life to continue to improve to continue to get better and, and be even more optimized. And I love that I am on this journey now. And I'm realizing this now and not when I'm like 60% of the way through my life. And I'm proud of myself for doing that work, and for working on myself in this way. Because I can't wait to see where I'm at in 245 1020 years from now. What What better version of myself can I create because I've already started this journey. Now you know what I mean? And there you have it, my friend, nine things that I have done in my 29 years that I'm really freaking proud of my hope that by sharing these things with you, you have a springboard of things that you can consider about yourself, reflect on for yourself, what have you done in your lifetime that you are proud of? Right? When you have a couple of things I want you to try to like write down like three to five things at least. And then I want you to send them to me on Instagram. Can you do that like as my birthday present? Send me a message and let me know like what you are proud of that you've done in your life. And like let's celebrate the heck out of that. If you love to today's episode, please please please share it over on social media. Be sure to tag me at living in sunshine. Happy birthday to me happy birthday to you just by relationship to me. And until next week, my friends I am sending you all the sunshine, good vibes. And I hope you make it a great day girlfriend. Thank you so much for listening to today's new episode. If you loved it, please send it to a friend share it on Instagram and tag me so I can see and consider leaving the show a rating or a review. Ratings and reviews are kind of like sharing or liking a post on Instagram and they really help the show grow and reach new women just like you. Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a new episode. And until next week, I am sending you all the sunshine, good vibes and I hope you make it a great day.